4 Years Long, 4 Years Strong

**This was supposed to be posted yesterday when I started writing it, but as you'll read later I've been terribly sick, so pretty please let it slide ;) & if this post is completely scattered, it's probably because I'm having trouble concentrating!**

A lot of people don't know this, but today is Anthony's & my 4-year anniversary.  (Even though he kissed me 10 days earlier on President's day...some people frown on that but hey, we're getting married so who cares!)  That means by the time we get married, we will have been together for almost 4 & a half & will have known each other for closer to 5 years.  That's a long time!  We have known for forever that we wanted to spend the rest of our lives together, but looking back I am glad that we waited so long.  Besides the obvious challenges of marriage, I think we have really matured & our bond has grown stronger over the last few years.  It's crazy to see just how much our relationship has changed for the better.

If you've known us for this long, you've probably been able to see the highlights to know what I'm talking about, but just to take a stroll down memory lane here is a glimpse into how the many years that we've spent together.

Our first picture together (March '08)

...please ignore my bangs. So glad I grew them out!

My 17th birthday (March '08)

His senior & my junior prom (April '08)

Notice the wedding pose under the "altar"...I think even then we knew :)

My senior homecoming (October '08)

Anthony's 19th birthday (January '09)

First anniversary (February '09)

My 18th birthday (March '09)

My senior prom (May '09)

Anthony's 20th birthday (January '10)

Second anniversary (February '10)

My 19th birthday (March '10)

Third anniversary (February '11)

My 20th birthday (March '11)

The day we got engaged (May '11)

The last picture we took together (February '12)

We have had so many more pictures (thousands, probably) & celebrated so many of life's milestones together (birthdays, Christmases, graduations, first jobs, dances, etc.), but I chose the ones from anniversaries & birthdays because it's really easy to remember the dates :) we didn't take any pictures on Anthony's 21st & now I can't remember why for the life of me.  I even remember what I was wearing!  Ha.  & we celebrated his 22nd quietly just the two of us, so that explains the lack of pictures there too.

There will also be no pictures from our fourth anniversary because I spent it sick & laying in bed feeling like dying.  (Sometimes I think that I am going into the wrong profession.)  Instead, I just put the last picture that we've been in together...& it even has to do with wedding things!

Anyway, you can't really see how far we've come just in pictures, but we truly have.  I don't know many high-school couples who can make it through moving to college, friends coming & going, trying to blend into each other's family, changing jobs, a ton of sickness thanks to my crappy immune system, & honestly just life in general.  It gets tough & we'll be the first people to tell you that.  Sometimes I don't know if we would've made it if it hadn't been for the amazing people we have supporting us in this.  All family aside because obviously they have been important, I have been so thankful for the people older than us at our church who have walked our path already & who have offered us guidance & counsel & fully supported us along the way.  These are the people who have invested tons of time in us, & are the kind of married couples that I want to be like when we get a little further down the line.  When I think of all of them, this is the Bible passage that comes to mind:

^"2 Teach the older men to be temperate, worthy of respect, self-controlled, and sound in faith, in love and in endurance.

 ³ Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. ⁴ Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, ⁵ to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.

 ⁶ Similarly, encourage the young men to be self-controlled. ⁷ In everything set them an example by doing what is good. In your teaching show integrity, seriousness ⁸ and soundness of speech that cannot be condemned, so that those who oppose you may be ashamed because they have nothing bad to say about us."

Titus 2:2-8

Clint & Mandie Sledge 

For quickly becoming two of our closest & best friends & for always being there for us to come to.  For finally convincing us to come to Mike Fortner's Sunday school class.  You are an awesome example & anyone would be lucky to call you their friend.  Not to mention for letting us love on your precious Carson! :)

Jay & Dawn Mooney

For being our teachers for the past 4-ish years, for opening your home to us, for always making sure we're included, for believing in us from the beginning.  Jay for coaching softball & having Anthony as part of the team...& Dawn for sitting in the stands in miserably hot (or cold) weather with me.  Also for trusting us with your kids & allowing us to develop a special bond with Joshua & Alyssa.  This summer, I'll also be saying "thank you" for spending your time doing our marriage counseling & performing our ceremony.  We wouldn't rather have anyone else up there!

Mike & Abby Estes

For all of the listening & advice-giving that you have done lately, for being completely honest about the trials of marriage, for being genuinely interested in our lives, & for giving us a new perspective on so many things.  Plus for spending the time teaching me how to knit because I am already making things for our future home! (dish cloths, dish scrubby, pot holders, etc...)

Mike & Lyndsey Ewing

For always letting us come over to hang out at your house & showing us what kind of place we want our home to be...an open door where our friends are always welcome.  & also just for Lyndsey for letting me vent all the time, giving me her wedding book, & always offering to help whenever she can :)

When you look up there, notice that all of these couples have been married roughly 5, 15, or 25 years...I just thought that was cool!

There are so many more that I could say!!! Kim, Laura, Vickie, Debbie, Scotty.....just so many others!  I could go on about everyone but it's about 7:23 at this moment & if I don't start getting ready in 7 minutes I'll be late for class :(

For all of the women that I mentioned, I just wanted to especially thank you for the godly counsel that you have been to me.  I love you all.  You are wonderful examples & I am thankful for the blessing that you all have been in my life!

One last thought: we became a couple on the last leap-year, & we'll be getting married on this one!  Maybe all of our milestones will happen every 4 years on leap-year?!

Did Somebody Say...Presents?!

Well, we are officially registered!  I ended up wanting to so badly after suit-shopping on Saturday that we spent the rest of the weekend on the internet picking things out.  As of right now, we have registries at Bed Bath & Beyond, Macy's & Sears.  (We were going to do Home Depot or Lowe's instead, but they either don't have registries or they don't do them online or if they were online it was much too confusing for me--or guests--to have to figure out).  While we were looking at china patterns at Macy's, I came across a bunch that were our colors!  But since we're having a red & black kitchen, I went for a white pattern with black designs.  

It turned out that even something that is supposed to be fun like registering could be stressful........who knew?  The stores suggest registering for twice as many gifts as you will have guests so that people will have a variety of items & price-points to choose from.  Well, we're having 150 guests & had serious trouble even getting to 200 gifts!  Everything that I looked at I asked myself "do I really want/need this?"  Anthony did the same things with all of his man stuff.  Like I said, not the easiest task.  I'm trying not to let little things like that (& a bunch of other wedding/life drama that has been going on lately) get to me.  I know this is supposed to be a fun time, so I'm doing my best to cherish all of it.  Haters gon' hate :)

As of today, it's only 163 days until our wedding!  Then we will be on a plane to Aruba & coming back to our new home a week later.  That's what I'm keeping my mind on & that's what helps me not sweat the small stuff.  Plus, the little random encouragements that I'm getting from my friends aren't hurting!

Kim sent me this picture last week & said she is seeing our colors popping up everywhere!  I guess I'm just such a trend-setter that a bunch of designers are recognizing what great style I have & want to use my ideas :) imitation is the sincerest form of flattery? hahaa!  

A's mom gave me these keys a while back, but this is the first chance I've had to get a decent picture of them all out of their wrappers.  Super cute!

Aaannnnddddd while I was playing around online, I found this AMAZING calligrapher.  Seriously, her envelopes are pure art.  I really want her to address our invitations!  I have a feeling it might be a little expensive, but I might just have to splurge on it.  Not sharing her just yet, though.  This one's too good not to keep to myself ;)

Garments For The Guys

Today was the big shopping day for the boys.  After lunch, we walked into JC Penny.  I got really worried at first because the first khaki suit that I found under the brand that I had liked (the only one that I had seen on the website) was ugly.  For real.  It felt more like a rain jacket than anything & the pattern was terrible.  Luckily, some of the boys were walking around & found a different suit under the same brand that I had liked.  I think this must have been the one I saw online because I loved it right away!  We had a lot of fun trying different combinations & colors.  & the salesperson told us we were way ahead of the game when it comes to time frame, so that made me happy!  I don't want to give away exactly what was chosen, but Anthony & Mitchell were the models & here are two of the looks that we were looking at:

I told them to look tough...they're the best!  This took a really super long time & they were such good sports about it, which I really appreciate!  

No one except the wedding party will know exactly what we pick until the big day.  Some things have to stay a surprise, right? :)

After suit shopping, we headed on over to the home section & had fun poking around there for a little while.  I had settled on registering at Lowe's & Bed Bath & Beyond only, but now I think I may do JCP or Macy's instead or in addition to BB&B.  I just loved some of the things in there!  Especially plates/bowls/cups...I haven't been able to find any that I love anywhere else.  I almost wanted to register right there on the spot, but I knew my mom might feel a little left out since she wasn't there.  Not to mention that would probably be something fun for Haley to tag along to...bet we could get into some trouble :)  I can't wait to register sometime soon though!  I think that will be one of the funnest parts of this whole process...I know the whole thing is supposed to be a fun time, but some things (like shopping & registering) are definitely funner than others (like making up a guest list)!  :)

When we left the mall to get my ring cleaned at Guven's, I decided to ask the owner (who we have known/done business with for years) how much it would cost to replace one of the little diamonds in my engagement ring.  When I first got it, I had to get them to file part of it down in one place where it was a little rough.  I had noticed a darker diamond too, but it didn't bother me that much at the time & I didn't want to be a pain for them.  He asked to see my ring & immediately saw what I was talking about.  He said "did WE do this?!"  When I told him yes, that they had made it for us, he immediately took it to the back & they fixed it free of charge.  He basically said "you don't mind, do you?"  Of course I didn't!  My finger felt lonely for about an hour (I only ever take it off when I'm getting ready in the morning or cooking), but it wasn't so bad.  While they were getting that done, we looked into some bridesmaid's jewelry.  They always do such a good job & for the best price.  Don't know why we even looked anywhere else when we were ring shopping!

One last thing for the night!  When we went for dinner at Which Wich, we went ahead & spent $.60 extra to get 2 of these plastic cups to add to our home collection :)


Probably nothing new until we go bridesmaids' dress shopping on the 3rd (March).  Plus I'm going to be super busy until then with school, so very little time for blogging!  

Major Meltdown

This is what me & Haley Rae's night looked like last night.  After a reeeaaaallllllyyyyyyy good dinner that we cooked for Anthony & my mom (no need to mention me almost burning the house down), we got to work in the living room floor.  Two hours, two markers, 125+ index cards, & a whole lot of stress.  I am so thankful for her! & for all the words of encouragement I'm getting on Facebook from people who have been in my shoes before.  

Here's what it boils down to: 150 seats.  193 people to invite.  Is there any chance that 43 people won't come?  Okay, okay.  There are 13 people that don't need seats.  Us, Jay, the bridesmaids, the groomsmen, & the ushers.  So 180 people that need seats...about 30 more than we can fit.  & there apparently might be more that we need to invite.  I know they say that not everyone will come, especially out of town family.  But is it safe to bank on that?...no.  & it would be just our luck that absolutely everyone would want/need to come.  This whole process has gotten so frustrating.  That combined with other normal (or not so normal) wedding annoyances, I just couldn't take any more last night.  It'd be great if this was the easiest thing in the world, if everyone had the same opinions, but that's never the case with anything, is it? 

Put all of these things together....................................................& you get a legit bridezilla moment.  Luckily, only 3 of the people that I'm most comfortable around (Anthony, Haley & my mom) were there to see it.  Haley let me binge on cookies, Anthony let me yell, & mom told me not to let it ruin my weekend.  I genuinely try not to let my craziness get the best of me, to not be a complete control freak & let other people's opinions count.  Last night was just the straw that broke the camel's back.  

There are probably 10-16 people on my mom's side that she knows won't come but need invitations out of respect.  I need to try to get the same kind of info from A's family, too.  Maybe they will have a similar number of people that probably won't attend.  If all else fails, I'm considering sending out 150 only.  Then as I get a few "no"s back, inviting more.  I know that seems tactless, but we literally can't have more than 150 people sitting for the ceremony.  The space is not capable of holding more, & our contract with the facility does not allow for it.  

At this point, I'm not sure what to do & I don't know how to figure it out.  I guess I'm just going to have to get a little more info then try to make an informed decision.

On to some happier things (trying to cheer my own self up)!

Recent picture inspirations:

Mandie sent me these :)

I just love keys. & red. Heaven.

Kera's new tumbler & a pillow that I saw in Britt & Charissa's apartment.

"C" wall ornament!

What can I say, metal was half off at Hobby Lobby.  On the left are some keys that I hope to incorporate in the wedding (then bring home) & on the right are some hooks that will hang in our home.  Love it!

Anthony's Valentine's Day present.  I may have gone a little...okay definitely overboard.  But he so deserves it.  After all, he puts up with my bridezilla moments & still wants to marry me anyway! & he totally spoils me.  The movies are supplies for his future man cave...doesn't mean no girls are allowed in it! Just a cool movie & game room :)

On another exciting note, I talked to MH & we are planning on doing engagement pictures the 4th weekend in March.  I can't wait!  I know we'll be running a little late on save-the-dates, but better late than never, right?  I'm really glad that it's going to be a little warmer for these pictures & I'm just so excited!  

Later this afternoon, we are going to look at the suits I think I want from JC Penny.  My parents, Anthony's parents, Mitchell, Anthony & me are all going out to lunch at Olive Garden first then going shopping.  Pics to come!

Mind Your Manners

For the past 9 months, I have had some pretty crazy things said to & about me.  I feel like people should know better, especially since I come from such a polite/Southern culture.  Apparently not.  Nothing has happened too recently, but I started thinking that maybe I should make a post about them.  I get emails from The Knot all the time about the "(insert #) best/worst (insert anything wedding-related)."  I have gotten one called "13 Comebacks to Rude Wedding Questions," but I can't believe that I haven't gotten one called "10 Rudest Things People Say To Engaged Women" by now!  So instead, I'll just share a few & hopefully get some laughs (or AMENs) along the way :)

**I just want to say...the only people that these questions don't bother me from are kids!  So if your child has asked me any of these questions, please don't think that it's directed at you because it's not rude coming from them (they're kids!) & I don't mind answering them at all.**

1. "Aren't you a little young to be getting married?"

I've had everyone from a female employee in a wedding dress store to a male college professor say this to me. At some point, you've just got to be like "haters gon' hate."  Enough said on this topic.

2. "Yeah, I was about your age when I got married...the first time."

What the heck? Way to put a huge negative cloud over us!  Just because you rushed into something & got divorced doesn't mean we will.  Every relationship is different & we are wholly committed to making ours work & making it work well.   

3. "When are you having kids?"

I've also heard another variation said to Anthony recently by a woman that I didn't even know: "When are you gonna give your momma some grand-babies?!" I wanted to be like..."lady if I don't talk to you at least once a month then my uterus is none of your business!" & I don't see why people are so obsessed with us having kids, clearly we are "too young to get married," so shouldn't we be WAY too young to have children?!  I think I've already ranted on this issue enough on previous posts & pretty much every form of social media, so moving on...

4. "15 months is an awfully long time to be engaged."

Yes, it is a long time.  A year & a quarter to be exact.  But in case anyone didn't know, I am planning this wedding completely on my own.  I have a hand in every little detail (no wedding planner here besides my big binder!) & am making a lot of things for the wedding myself.  I am also doing this while going to school (& field experience) full-time, working part-time & volunteering at church.  I want every detail to be perfect & the whole day to be magical for both us & the people that get to share this special time with us.  You only get married once!  Like they say, Rome wasn't built in a day (or even a year, which most people consider to be long enough or too long for an engagement).

5. "Am I invited to your wedding?"

Normally, this disguised as "I'd love to be able to see the big day!"  Still rude nonetheless.  I don't think that a lot of people understand how expensive a wedding actually is & that it's not just throwing the party together that costs money.  The people getting married have to pay a set rate or base-cost for most things (which is already a lot...more than I care to think about), then extra for food, place settings, chairs, etc. per person.  There are so many people that we need to invite between both of our families, church family, & friends.  We also have a very strict & small number of people we can invite, so hearing this question is basically like listening to nails on a chalkboard for me.  If we can't invite them, it makes me feel guilty/sad because I wish we could have absolutely everyone there.  

6. "Is your ring real?"

Believe it or not, I have also gotten this same sentiment as "I thought that was fake!"  I don't know what people hope to accomplish by asking this because if it is real, the person is offended that you asked & if it's not, they're either A. embarrassed that people think it is & maybe admit it or B. just pretend that it's real & are still quietly embarrassed.  It seems like a lose-lose situation to me.  Sometimes people ask or try to guess how much it cost, too.  That may be even ruder!  I don't know because it's none of my business, & if it's none of mine then it's definitely none of yours!  

It's ironic that I'm writing this today because my brother-in-law Andrew emailed me this picture this morning :)  I took this photo with his wicked awesome new camera before he left for Italy & have been dying to see it.  Definitely the best picture that I've gotten of my ring, by far.

7. "So, you're still going to have a year of college after you get married?"

Yes, I will have one semester left of classes & one semester of student-teaching (which is basically like working a full-time job).  It has been done before.  Even though I know it will probably be a lot to take on, this is my choice, & I feel confident that I will be able to handle it.

8. "Oh you have to have/do (x, y, z) for your wedding."

No, actually I don't.  The only people that get a say in the wedding besides me is Anthony, my parents, his parents & sometimes the wedding party.  Other than that, even the smallest detail isn't up to anyone else because it's no one else's day.  I am always open to suggestions, but when people start making demands or telling me that I "have" to do something, chances are I don't even listen to what they say.

9. "That's such a great idea!  Do you care if I borrow/steal it?"

Yes, of course I care!  I am pouring so much time, energy & creativity into this wedding & my ideas should be mine alone to keep.  Part of me regrets posting so many things on Pinterest or even on this blog because when I  hear of or see other people (even strangers) doing the same things (or see that they're re-pinning practically every wedding thing that I post), I get a little jealous inside.   I want this wedding to be one-of-a-kind for me & Anthony, to perfectly reflect our personalities & relationship.  That's not the kind of thing that people should just be able to take & stick directly into their wedding.  

10. "Can I see your wedding dress?"

Nope...if I haven't offered to show it to you, you can't.  I want the dress to be a surprise to everyone, especially Anthony (even my mom almost let one of the major details of the dress slip in front of him the other night.  Luckily, he wasn't listening).  It's a very special & private thing, & like I was saying above, this is one thing that I definitely do not want to be copied.  I made sure not to pin a picture of it, too!  If you're at our wedding, you'll see it then & if we aren't able to invite you (see #5), then I promise I will be bursting at the seams to post pictures on Facebook!

Recent Inspirations:

In AWANAs last night, I was teaching the girls to make friendship bracelets...so I decided to make an example one in our colors :)

While I was in WalMart getting supplies for the bracelets, I passed the card isle & couldn't resist snapping a picture of all the wedding gift bags.  They're all so precious!!

M. Sledge

Well I promised exciting news!  

First of all, for everyone who doesn't know, my cousin Nicole is pregnant!  Hailey Brook is going to have a little brother or sister (won't know which for a few more weeks).  We found out over Christmas, & we are super excited for their growing family :)  On the downside, she is due a little over 3 weeks before our wedding, & there is some uncertainty as to how she'll be feeling by the time the big day rolls around.  Just to make things easier on everyone, we decided that it might be best if she is able to attend just as a guest & not have any responsibilities to worry about.

Nicole was generous enough to say it was okay for me to pick someone else to be a bridesmaid (she will still be a huge part of the wedding day!), & I was so excited to be able to ask my sweet friend Mandie Sledge to be part of our wedding!  We have grown so much closer since the beginning of Anthony's and my engagement, so it's just a huge blessing to be able to ask her to be even more part of this day :)  

Told you it would be great & exciting news!!!  

The sun kind of attacked us for the second picture!  :) love you, friend!

Also, I ordered that canvas print & can't wait for it to come in a few weeks.  Here are some of the contenders that were competing for the spot in the painting (I'll take a picture of it when it comes in to reveal which one we chose) : 

Please do not crop or altar this image in any way.

Copyright Mandie Sledge Photography.

Please do not crop or altar this image in any way.

Copyright Mandie Sledge Photography.

Please do not crop or altar this image in any way.

Copyright Mandie Sledge Photography.

Please do not crop or altar this image in any way.

Copyright Mandie Sledge Photography.

Please do not crop or altar this image in any way.

Copyright Mandie Sledge Photography.

For more information about Mandie's photography, visit her blog or her Facebook page!